Just like the Wizard of Oz. A meander through the field of poppies into a deep sleep. Floating. Dreaming. No boundaries and not a care in the world that would suck you back from this state of mind. A momentary lapse of reasoning that the stop signs were missed. Oblong, rectangles, circles, white, blue, orange...jagged little morsels. Highways and thruways become different routes. They are a bit tricky ya know! The door locks behind you upon entering. Invitations all over so enticing and dressed to impress. Dancing for weeks into months into years that seem just like minutes. Long conversations with strangers. "The shoulder that I leaned on was carved out of stone." Just when you think that you couldn't get much higher, you look down to see that you really cannot get much lower. Some look so low that they are looking up through a wooden box with dirt all around it. Melancholia and the infinite sadness will walk hand in hand with you. Silent whispers. Fight or flight. The fork in the road. Temporary status until your name turns into desperation. You'll be so busy you won't even notice, I promise! When you can stop you don't want to. When you wanna stop, you can't. The walls are closing in and they are not cushioned! Taunted and tormented, and the only thing that makes it go away is the very thing that makes it come back. I wouldn't say it is so much a win win situation by any means. Early departures and we are not at the airport, the bus station, train station, or flagging down a taxi.
A thought from "The Salton Sea":
A thought from "The Salton Sea":
"So that's where I found myself. No, I should choose my words more wisely. This is the world I sought out. The land of the perpetual night party. Day swallowing night and night swallowing day. The crank compressing time like some divine piston on its awesome down stroke. We've been at this for three days...or is it four? Tweakers, lokers, slammers, coming and going, swearing eternal allegiance and undying love for one another, only to wake up after the binge and realize you wouldn't walk across the street to piss on one of them if their head was on fire. Three days. Or is it four? I know what you're thinking, but don't give up on me just yet. Just wait 'til I've told my whole story. And keep your eyes open. Nothing is as it seems...For the people who don't do drugs, or just do them occasionally, it's something that becomes your life, and you belong. You finally hit bottom and you know who you are, because you can't go any lower. When you find...a friendship that you wouldn't have found anywhere else. Still and all, there's a kind of intimacy with those that can go the distance. Sometimes you see the world so clearly...and you know just what to do, and just when to do it. Just what you should've done, and when you should've done it."
Let's straighten this out. I don't promote nor use. I'm around it at certain venues and if I wasn't certain that I could say no, I have no business there to begin with. I get high on the music itself. We have choices. It's a part of my story, my voyage and my struggles. My tale as it unfolds for all to see. There are a lot of acquaintances that we have in this world and not many true friends. I've had some true friends leave this world with a piece of me with them. They never asked if they could take it, they just left with it. I also have some friends that are still with me and I want to say with the utmost sincerity from my heart...I LOVE YOU! Please take a step back from the cliff, you never know when the wind will pick up and push you further than you ever wanted to go.
JG
No comments:
Post a Comment